Taking someone's virginity is the worst kind of sex. amirite?

My partner and I lost ours together, and while it wasn't the best sensation-wise, it was a loving experience that also paved the way for many more years of better sex!

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This was my experience. From there sex has either been amazing or, well "at least its sex"

by Anonymous 2 years ago

That could literally be any long-term relationship, though. And it's normal. You're not meant to f*** like a pornstar every time (now THAT'S unrealistic to me).

by Anonymous 2 years ago

To be fair neither of you have anything to compare it too other than your previous sessions with your only partner.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

thank God I saw this

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Same here. Even today, I don't have sex just to have an orgasm - I do it because it's such a love-filled experience each time :)

by Anonymous 2 years ago

My first time was surprisingly pretty amazing, but I also didn't bleed nor feel pain after the first couple of minutes. And the guy I was with was so sweet and made it memorable

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I want to have sex with a virgin because then she won't have any idea how bad I am at it.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yeah but you'll always be the point at which everyone else after was better.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Literally, most men don't care whether or not the woman they are with has an orgasm, or even if she enjoys the experience or is attracted to them. As long as she opens her legs and lets it happen, they still counted as a "win". These are the same guy to turn around and complain when a woman is a "starfish", and blames, her lack of enjoyment on her own lack of participation. It just never occurs to them that she is an actual person, and not just a human masturbation sleeve put on this earth to make their PP feel good

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Oof that's not true. Many many men tie their value/confidence with sex to whether or not they can "make" a woman cum. Some just want to bed as many women as possible. Most struggle to get to even one woman

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I had no idea how bad the sex was with my 1st boyfriend. It was really, really bad. He said I made weird noises when I came, but it was just me maneuvering around his "moves" so I could basically get to the finish line myself.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

She'll still know, dude. They always know. Some how, they always know.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This is exactly why insecure douche bags want to sleep with virgins. It's all about their own ego.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yeah. That is my impression. They believe an inexperienced partner won't realize how bad/brief they are at it.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This is actually a good reason too If you are not experienced yourself why would you want someone experienced?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

To help guide you in what to do?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Why would you want a guide who's been with many others before, and not someone who's learning alongside you and sharing this moment together?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It doesn't matter if it was only 15 seconds, I'm the best you ever had!

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Well my time with a virgin is still married to me after 18 years, I wonder if she is happy or doesn't know the difference

by Anonymous 2 years ago

She'd still know lmao

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Sex without kindness is a waste of time.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I figured Virgin sex is about a gentle, intimate, romantic experience. If you'd rather hump like gorillas you'd def need an experienced partner lol

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yeah OP ratted themselves out here. Was a first time of my first time without either of us knowing and the whole thing was a play and experiment with bodies. Later it gets to the gorilla grunting.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

>gentle, intimate, romantic experience My first time was with another virgin. This is absolutely what it was. No, it wasn't the most intense or whatever. But it was a good bonding experience.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Meh. Husband and I lost ours to each other and it wasn't so bad. We went very slow and backed off if it started to hurt to mess around some more until it was comfortable. Definitely took a long time but it was very good on my end. While I do like being able to be ready faster now with practice but its still a pleasant memory for me.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Not all sex is about the physical orgasm. For many people, the egotistical pleasure is more important. Most people can reach orgasm whenever they want, by themselves, in a timely and utilitarian way. Then, sex can become about something else, about a narrative we tell ourselves. For some that's a loving and giving narrative, which can include helping someone have a safe, respectful, and tender first-time \[assuming all other context is appropriate\]. For others, egotistical reward is in the notch, the 'they could have chose anyone but they chose me,' the 'I was the first here and I'll always be in your head for that.' With that sort of mindset, I think plenty of people engage with sex for reasons that are more egotistically motivated, for better and for worse, than just for the utility of physical pleasure.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

False. The first guy I had sex with was my high school boyfriend and I literally never think about him in any context. You definitely aren't "always in their head" for being the first person they had sex with. If you are someone worth remembering, they will remember you. If you were just a whatever dude in their life they will absolutely forget about you.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yep. I did not lose it to my first boyfriend, who I was deeply in love with. I was young and scared and he never pressured me too much (he did make it clear he wanted to!). We eventually broke up and I was so sad that I did it with the next guy I dated. I guess he was my boyfriend for like 3 months. II don't remember it being a bad experience but it certainly was not memorable. I remember his name but honest to God his face is a blur; this was so many moons ago. I do still remember all about my first boyfriend and think of him fondly every now and then, despite being married for years and loving my husband very much.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I think the point is that you're able to answer the question "who was your first" way more easily than "who was your 7th"

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I would agree with this but I would also say that the number doesn't matter. If the 1st person was forgettable and the 7th was amazing, you'd definitely remember the 7th more.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yes not everyone is the same. Some people remember, some don't. And you obviously remembered him when you wrote this so...

by Anonymous 2 years ago

it's so annoying when people just don't get that mentioning your ex-boyfriend doesn't mean you care or think about them.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Exactly, it's not the fact *that* they're mentioning them, it's how they mention them; tone of voice, body language, choice of words, etc.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Thank you. With all the sex you're going to have in your lifetime..the first time you do it doesn't hold much weight. No sane person is thinking back to the first time they had sex every other waking minute of their life.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It could also be that someone who constantly/ almost exclusively tries to take a woman's virginity would think that way (in regards to "always be in your head."). That's at least how I interpreted that line. Not sure if that's what OP meant or not.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Like it or not, by far most people remember their first. So to many its probably an ego boost, and to others, they dont like the idea of their partner having somebody they'd more easily remember. It doesnt matter how good or bad your first was, it is remembered.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It's weird that people get off to that power trip

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Everything is about sex, except sex, sex is about power.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It is actually not about being dominant or possessive. Maybe in a toxic man's mindset. But not to those who actually care about their partner's wellbeing and happiness. I do agree that men who fantasize about taking a woman's virginity are usually thinking possesively and most likely dont care about or don't understand how to give women pleasure. But with the right person and timing, it is nothing but love, care, and patience.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

If I have to guess, the people who have a virgin kink have so BC of a few reasons 1. Virgins are ofc inexperienced, if you are her first then you are guaranteed to be her best. If she is more experienced then she will have higher standards to what's good which makes (some) men insecure. 2. They see women (or anyone for that matter) as objects so having someone else play with their toy "ruins" it for them. 3. Relegion telling us that sex is something only for your special someone so women opening up their legs for you and only you makes ya feel special.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

>Relegion telling us that sex is something only for your special someone so women opening up their legs for you and only you makes ya feel special. This is not just religion. It is a fact of life. Someone who has 100 partners in a year does not see sex as commitment or something to be shared with a special person

by Anonymous 2 years ago

When I lost my virginity, I lost it to someone more experienced than me. But I was an avid reader and got tips from books. He was shocked that I was actually good at sex. Thank you The Joy of Sex. Lol

by Anonymous 2 years ago

is that a book

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This seems like you're upset that the woman can't perform well for you. I was my wife's first and only and because I cared for her I tried my best to make her as comfortable as I could. I'm pretty sure it wasn't terrible for her. If the guy is selfish it will almost certainly be bad for her. If he cares and is attentive to her it can be good. Or at least not a bad experience.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I'm gonna have to disagree firmly. Only reason first times are so awful is because men have no patience and just think about what they want. If they consider making it a pleasant comfortable experience with no real pressure. Then it's great and just like ecstasy. Source I've done this 5 times first was when I was also a virgin. I've never had a bad first time it's always been great but I clarify that we don't need to have sex and that makes them comfortable.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

You suck at foreplay

by Anonymous 2 years ago

If you dont know how to make losing virginity pleasurable then you shouldnt have sex with virgins. Its as simple as that.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Lol use your tounge dude

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I think this is a young man or immature man's fantasy, I think I lost touch with this in my very early 20s

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Just roll up your sleeves and eat her out like it was your last meal on earth. Make every encounter with other guys after that be disappointing. Stay toxic

by Anonymous 2 years ago

> is typically painful the first time Bit of a misconception there

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Not really. Over 50% of women say it was painful.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Because it happens when you're young and brash teenagers. Most *men* don't care about their partner's pleasure. Teenage boys don't care one bit.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

wonder where you got that statistic from? there's billions of women who have lost their virginity in this world, so that might be one of the most unreliable statistics I've ever heard about. Not denying it can hurt, simply saying that the statistic is of no better use than some random number out of my ass.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

They got it from a women's tabloid.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

No, it is not. majority of women feel pain.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I definitely don't understand the obsession of taking someone's virginity. It hurt

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Creepy obsession most insecure losers have.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

"Virgins? Yuck. I like hoes." - Patrice O'Neal.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Well yea if you imagine losing your virginity to an asshole of course it wont be good. Doesn't matter if male or female if they care about you they can make the first time memorable in a positive way.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

As a woman, I'd like to counter that and say that its actually the most intimate kind of sex. My first real time was kinda uncomfortable and I did tap out after a few minutes but it was great none the less. Of course it depends on the setting and the person you do it with, I was lucky and had such a caring partner. This definitely just depends on the person. Just to give another perspective.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

As a lesbian I guess I'm a little lost. My first time was great, and I have also been with a few virgins, and my guess is that the first penetration being a penis probably isn't pleasant, I wouldn't want that. Maybe, just maybe and call me crazy, more heterosexual couples, with a virgin female partner shouldn't have intercourse the first few times, get her used to a finger or two then try more.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Hey it really shouldn't be painful any time, even your first. Unless you're into that. If it hurts unintentionally it's wrong.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

okay but how is this an unpopular opinion?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The only time I was with one was when I *was* one. Those are wonderful memories,but yes it definitely gets better as you gain knowledge and experience.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The first time is painful if you suck. Otherwise going slow, with lots of foreplay everyone has a good time.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This. It's expected to be painful because some men suck and don't pay attention to the woman's needs.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Everything is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Oscar, why don't you explain it to me like I'm five?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I enjoyed losing my virginity because we took our time. It was a pleasant experience, and it didn't hurt at all. Also I'm a woman that took my husband's virginity, and our first time together was fun. It's not rocket science to figure out, and you learn their preferences through time.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yeah, that's not an unpopular opinion. It's just fact

by Anonymous 2 years ago

No aids

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Had an orgasm my first time. Didn't hurt at all. Was physically and emotionally ready and a good time was had by all!

by Anonymous 2 years ago

so is all sex. Im ace tho, so I guess it doesn't count.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

You can only have a first time once, some people value it personally more than others. That goes for other things too, not just sex

by Anonymous 2 years ago

First time sex shouldn't be painful for the woman if she is relaxed and calm, if she's not I wouldn't move forward. It can be uncomfortable but shouldn't be painful

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Coz then I can set the bar low for the rest of society

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I loved my first time, he was patient and caring and listened to me. I didn't finish, but somehow it's still one of the best nights I've had in my life

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I did it once, felt awful, but they were excited, they went through a "hoe phase" (nothing wrong with that) shortly after

by Anonymous 2 years ago

100% agree. Did it once and it was the worst experience. Could barely get it in even after 30 mins of foreplay plus lube.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The idea that the kind of men that place so much importance on having sex with virgin women at all care about them having a good time is the part you're missing here.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It's meant to be a more romantic, emotional, sensual thing. It's very intimate. If you just want to nut, get an experienced girl. If you're trying to have a deeper connection and build something together, then you want a virgin

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I don't think experienced girls are any less sensual. Intimacy can be had with anyone it's all about the mindset going into the playtime.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I absolutely agree. Wanting only a virgin woman is creepy af

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The other person is not good at sex obviously, but the excitement of being someone's first time is unforgettable

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Not all sex is about the physical orgasm. For many people, the egotistical pleasure is more important.Most people can reach orgasm whenever they want, by themselves, in a timely and utilitarian way. Then, sex can become about something else, about a narrative we tell ourselves.For some that's a loving and giving narrative, which can include helping someone have a safe, respectful, and tender first-time \[assuming all other context is appropriate\].For others, egotistical reward is in the notch, the 'they could have chose anyone but they chose me,' the 'I was the first here and I'll always be in your head for that.'With that sort of mindset, I think plenty of people engage with sex for reasons that are more egotistically motivated, for better and for worse, than just for the utility of physical pleasure.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I've heard some horror stories. Not interested.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Maybe because I lost mine to another girl but I had a great time lol. but fr, i think its also because i was pretty comfortable with myself before losing it so that's a lot different than a virgin who doesn't masturbate/is uncomfortable with their body "intercourse is typically painful the first time" maybe try focusing completely on her the first time instead of just trying to make it enjoyable for you.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The first time no she won't enjoy. But one for me it's an honor to be her first. Woman usually honor their first and if it's given to me I appreciate it. Second a woman with less bodies to me is more honorable because it shows she has more self respect 🫡

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Y'all are so beta it's killing me

by Anonymous 2 years ago

For real, I never understood why some dudes want virgins in exchange for blowing up a building.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yikes. Lol Tell me you're disappointing in bed without actually saying you're disappointing in bed. You kind of ratted on yourself here 😂

by Anonymous 2 years ago

There's a strong correlation between virginity and not having sexual skills/knowledge/daring, so I agree with OP. Sure, sex is also about emotions and fantasies, but I personally much prefer someone who knows and loves what they are doing. This is just an opinion, but I tried to base it in logic. If you've met someone who wants to channel their love for you into making you feel good in bed despite being inexperienced, great. If you got someone who is happy to satisfy you but has other priorities, that's fine too. But it's super awkward to try to enjoy something when the other person is visibly not into it despite loving you. Not to mention it will mess with you mentally long term. The skills to handle uncomfortable sexual situations comes mainly from sexual experience, which can be compensated for with emotional maturity but it's very hard to make up for it. The natural progression to this would be that they also discover what they like but there's no guarantee you'll be compatible. Why should anyone take that risk? They say love conquers all, but no it really doesn't. Especially when sex is the ultimate display of love and acceptance for one, and an anxiety ridden trip or chore for the other. At the end of the day, the important thing is knowing what you find important, finding someone who's values are compatible with that and to keep improving on yourself. Effective and honest communication from all parties is key. Being ignorant of yourself and others just takes opportunities and control away from you.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

first time isn't supposed to hurt. sex in general is always supposed to feel good 😬

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Not every person is as you have generalized them. Some women are perfectly capable of enjoying sex as a virgin. And some women do see it as a special moment. That doesn't mean your opinion is wrong, it just means it isn't right all of the time.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Maybe it's YOU that is boring, awkward, and painful. Did it ever occur to you there might be a guy out there who put in some time and effort to make it as pleasant as it can be in other ways. Maybe dominating or possessing wasn't in his mind at all. I think this entire rant says a lot more about YOU than it does about anyone else.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Taking a virgin's virginity (either m/f) is one of the purest and moat intimate acts of physical love that I see. Not my problem y all do it wrong or for sick reasons or just "4 fun" lol

by Anonymous 2 years ago