+36 Toilet Seats are actually terribly and incentivise time wasting, amirite?

by No_Finger6273 1 week ago

Why not make them comfortable though? Even if you are only in there for 5 minutes, why would you want those 5 minutes to be uncomfortable?

by lavinia05 1 week ago

It only takes me 5 minutes to walk to the shop but I like to make those 5 minutes as uncomfortable as possible by ensuring I am wearing shoes 3 sizes too small and underwear back to front

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I'll take the shoes. Chuckling now.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

This pretty much ruined my day.

by Charming-Wrangler 1 week ago

Tamiflu does that?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Where is the pun in this? It seems very straightforward and literal

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Is it a pun if it's literal?

by Brief_Scratch 1 week ago

I only have to eat a few times a day, I should make that uncomfortable by eating food that tastes terrible so I won't waste my time and money eating unnecessary food that is not essential to my survival

by tatum04 1 week ago

Good point

by New_Specialist 1 week ago

My inlaws have the most uncomfortable toilet seat. It's like it cuts into your legs. For the few minutes I'm in there, I'd prefer not to feel like I'm sustaining injuries.

by Impossible-Fly-8360 1 week ago

Oh ow. You just reminded me of a past pain lol, now I gotta share. Mom had a toilet seat made of wood. Sat down on it and it split in half... but the 2 pieces with my weight caused the split to clamp together in a pinch on my ass(. Only toilet seat I ever busted, and pray I ever will. OW!

by Anonymous 1 week ago

My grandmother's wooden toilet seat partially cracked and she wouldn't fix it because it wasn't fully broken (and she didn't have to use it). Oh my poor lil thighs.

by Karlee79 1 week ago

Ow! Ya mine thankfully fixed it as soon as I pointed that out. Thats gotta be against a geneva convention or something. Im sorry.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

The fabric toilet seat covers are so gross to me, you can't properly and easily disinfect that like you can plastic. And you'd have to constantly wash it to make sure it's clean compared to just quickly wiping it down with Lysol. I never understood that or carpeted bathrooms. But I do agree that it's nice to be comfortable, and if you're constipated you might be in there a while...

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Idk, some opinions are actually unpopular. But sometimes they are broad judgements and generalizations of their own individual personal experience.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

You're totally right. I disagree with OP, which is exactly the point…

by Swimming_Book 1 week ago

What? Makes total sense to me. I hate spending time on the toilet so much I installed those anti-homeless spikes on mine!

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Username checks out

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Lmao thank you for noticing

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I had chemo ass and C Diff when I was sick last year. You have my respect for living with that.

by Cummerataevelyn 1 week ago

Holy mackerel, that's no joke. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Hope you're doing better now. And honestly, I got really lucky. I spent ten days in the hospital last year, but the meds have been working wonders since. Just last month I was declared "in clinical remission, no signs of disease present." I have to take a daily pill and get infusions every six weeks, but I dodged all the surgeries that were almost needed. All-in-all, I only lost a few months of my regular life. I've got an aunt nearly on her deathbed because of Crohn's right now, and as stupid as it sounds, the worst part is knowing she's being ravaged by what totally missed me. Like her suffering indirectly lead to advances in medicine enough to make it almost a non-issue in my life. Feels bad man.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I can appreciate that. I had a very close friend who was like a mother to me who passed away from the same type of leukemia I had. I felt guilty that her kids lost their mum but I had effectively the best outcome possible. I really miss popcorn with butter. That "butter " at the theatre does not do pretty things to me.

by Cummerataevelyn 1 week ago

UC is so bad. My mom will be at a restaurant sprinting to the bathroom within minutes of eating something. They really have no control!

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Yeah I can't imagine that kind of pain. She's doing a lot better now that she's on on Remicade, although the process to get it was absolutely ridiculous.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Another excellent example of home sometimes when you think something might be dumb or superfluous, first consider that the something is not made with you in mind

by Anonymous 1 week ago

This. All those "silly" gadgets are 95% of the time for disabled people, marketed so that enough abled people will buy it that the product can actually sell considering economies of scale

by Tamara15 1 week ago

Meds. I take a med that causes severe constipation but it's a bipolar med and I have to take it. Sucks big time.

by Low-Champion-9845 1 week ago

Out of curiosity what do you do for the extreme constipation? I'm currently pregnant AND have a cyst big enough to be a second baby. My bowels are so squished tight at the moment that not a single pellet is coming out of there without a huge dose of laxatives (and I can't take the nice ones like Miralax either because of other meds).

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I feel your pain of number 2. About number 1, I'm portuguese, so I have a bidet at home. Whenever I see that it's taking too much tp, it's bidet time!

by Anonymous 1 week ago

And probably don't feel like explaining it to people that they generously allow to use their toilet.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Probably with those tiny rough pieces of tissue. Dammit I need my bidet

by Anonymous 1 week ago

The best reply 😂

by Anonymous 1 week ago

You'll regret it when you have a throbbing hemorrhoid

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Or an oozing, throbbing hemorrhoid. They happen too.

by Deltagorczany 1 week ago

It IS bad for your body and is more likely to cause hemorrhoids, I recommend if you are spending long amounts of time on the toilet to get something like a stool, to elevate your legs a bit off the ground, it helps a lot for me. Signed, someone who has been to so many doctors but still alas is in the bathroom very much of my day.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Toilet time is the last bastion of American freedom.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Poop Police

by Willmsnorma 1 week ago

Dookie Detective

by glendagreenfeld 1 week ago

Fecal Facilitator

by PossessionLogical556 1 week ago

Turd Tyrant

by glendagreenfeld 1 week ago

Doo Doo Dictator

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Feces Fuhrer

by Dhand 1 week ago

Bowel Movement Baron

by glendagreenfeld 1 week ago

Poostapo

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Droppings Detractor

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Asshole Accelerator

by Anonymous 1 week ago

defecating detective

by SunPsychological7944 1 week ago

Indeed 🫡 perhaps even the defecation detective

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Stool scrutinizer

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I agree that I hate the "comfy" toilet seats but not for your reasons. I just hate the material and the feeling of squishing something but my bare ass

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Have you tried a stool for your legs? Might help 😊excuse the pun

by Anonymous 1 week ago

IT DOES HELP!!!!! Source- me, an ibs sufferer who literally cannot leave the bathroom some days.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I pooped on my own lap before realizing what you actually meant. It didn't help.

by Kind-Grab-3065 1 week ago

Some of us have digestive issues dude.

by maria59 1 week ago

Wait til you're married with kids

by ullricharyanna 1 week ago

As someone with ulcerative colitis, it can be anywhere from 5 minutes to 45 minutes. Is what it is.

by MinimumCalendar5974 1 week ago

opens the door again after 45 minutes spent calming themselves "THAT TOILET SEAT IS A SUCKER'S PURCHASE. WHAT WERE YOU EVEN DOING IN THERE. LOOK I TIMED YOU. SEE A DOCTOR."

by NetMelodic 1 week ago

*goes back in bathroom*

by Overall-Name5073 1 week ago

🤣Imagining this scene playing out is destroying me 💀

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I think I would rather decompress anywhere else 😭😭 sitting on the toilet for a break at work is one thing, but in your own house??

by Mararunte 1 week ago

Sometimes it's the only quiet place

by anabel17 1 week ago

And sitting on a regular toilet seat for that long is bad for your body and can lead to hemorrhoids or other problems so why wouldn't you make sure it was more comfortable/suited to your needs? lol.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

A step stool, or something helps a lot with that. The position of the toilet seat is not ideal, I don't know why we haven't fixed that yet.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I get clots on my periods i sit on the toilet to just not have to run back after passing a lemon size clot. They also seem to just disregard ibd and ibs even existing. Even if people go to the doctor most times it doesn't help.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Must be nice to be Mr. No Diarrhea Ever

by Savings-Kangaroo 1 week ago

how often do you get the squits?

by BagHaunting 1 week ago

Tell me you've never been married with kids without telling me you've been married with kids.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Or they dint have ibs or Ibd. It just seems like a ignorant opinion to have that people should only take 5 minutes.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I didn't get the hype until I used a toilet with a heated seat at a Japanese restaurant. I came back to the table all giddy.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I feel like a lot of social media would collapse if all did this. I know peeps that take 20-30 mins in there. I assume it's 15 mins of pooping and 5-15 mins of mindlessly scrolling SM. I don't really disagree with you but I'm like let peeps have their time.

by ResolutionCool5816 1 week ago

I mean that is just barbaric. Doom scrolling is exclusive to home thrones.

by ResolutionCool5816 1 week ago

It's better suited for workplaces IMO

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Yeah you have to be a real animal to want to spend any extra time in a public stall.

by ClassicLynx7087 1 week ago

I go until my leg starts falling asleep, which is usually around 15-20 mins.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Oh boy. No opinion on soft toilet seats, but people that sit on the toilet for long periods of time are inviting hemorrhoids. Which isn't the end of the world, but if you start getting them once in awhile, maybe rethink how much time you spend sitting, as well as straining. Not a doctor, just hoping to help.

by Ok_Calligrapher 1 week ago

Do hemi's come from just sitting on the toilet or is it more the push/straining? How is sitting on the toilet different than sitting on a chair?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

It's just from sitting. A chair supports your butthole, but a toilet seat has a hole in the middle, so gravity and the weight of your body cause your anus to bulge.

by Outside_Marsupial 1 week ago

This

by Griffin81 1 week ago

This guy wants homeless architecture for his own toilet

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Just bc I'm in there 45 minutes doesn't mean each second was necessary, many of those minutes were luxury time that I refuse to give up!

by smithamtherese 1 week ago

Yeah, imagine thinking "going to the doctor" is gonna magically make you have to use the bathroom less. Lol

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Ironically they could prescribe you something that makes you go even more.

by Werner89 1 week ago

This was definitely written by a man

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Somebody has CLEARLY never had diarrhoea or food poisoning. I had food poisoning last month and sitting on the toilet for an hour just to be safe and sure that everything, lungs included, have somehow been evacuated from your asshole is the minimum requirement!

by No-Woodpecker-8169 1 week ago

Clearly they don't have ibs or ibd either.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

My disabled ass begs strongly to disagree. And in truth OP, maybe, instead of judging someone and assuming something was a "frivolous purchase", maybe try having a bit of compassion. Your cousin, or someone who either regularly visits or lives with him, might have developed IBS or Crohn's disease recently. Or maybe he just doesn't wanna freeze his ass off every time he goes to drop a load. You don't know. If nothing else, you could remember this little gem: "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I'm not tryna sit my ass on a freezing toilet seat

by ivalebsack 1 week ago

fuzzy/soft seats are more just gross to me because everyones putting their bare ass on it and they're way harder to clean. but also go pound sand I'll watch two full movies on the toilet if i want to

by Rmueller 1 week ago

Did corporate write this?

by Krajcikbrennon 1 week ago

I have a well defined childhood memory of a pleather like toilet seat that started to peel and was a nightmare to sit on, so I've always had a grudge towards any kind of toilet seat that isn't plain

by Anonymous 1 week ago

corporate schill alert

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Toilet seats are actually terribly…what?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

10 minutes 1-2 times a day for years and years and years. sounds like a good $50 purchase to me

by Anonymous 1 week ago

So should they be made of rough, splintery wood - maybe with a couple of rusty nails sticking out?

by mrunte 1 week ago

Spoken like the childfree youth.

by Ok-Sheepherder-9993 1 week ago

Just push.... sure, until you blow an O ring.

by Visual-Specialist 1 week ago

I take a while and I want to be comfortable even if i was there for 1 minute. Its hard to concentrate If I was standing up, I don't want to make everything a chore.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

OP has never wasted a moment or taken a break. OP sleeps standing up and with one foot in the air ready to take a step as soon as the alarm goes off. OP is so productuve he has 4 hours at the end of a 24 hour day. OP saves so much time that he actually works backwards. One time OP was in a hurry and bumpted into himself. He had to shove himself asside and it cost him 2 seconds.

by gideon28 1 week ago

You police coworkers bathroom time don't you.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Hun. People aren't just sitting there contemplating using the restroom.

by Efrainkris 1 week ago

This is a very naive opinion presumably from a young, fit and healthy person who has no concept of the idea that other people are different.

by Dortha14 1 week ago

"Nah" I say, as I kick my feet up on my squatty potty and get settled in for a nice sesh.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Your spelling and attention to detail are actually terribly

by Limp-Lobster6499 1 week ago

Proofread next time

by Important-Assist2813 1 week ago

I found the guy who's never had food poisoning or bladder issues!

by Hungry_Ad_4629 1 week ago

Brother, you are absolutely wrong. I work outside and during the winter months it's miserable. But when I go take my daily poop and my cold cheeks hit those warm seats the bliss is enough to convince me to finish the day.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

as someone who ibs it takes me 15 mins so that would be heavenly

by powlowskialda 1 week ago

Ok, then buy one made out of brambles, you win.

by Loud-Swordfish-5554 1 week ago

I watched some guy do that as an unamused old lady waited for the bus. OP would consider her too comfortable with the situation

by Loud-Swordfish-5554 1 week ago

"Doctor I have a problem with going to the bathroom" "Diarrhea? Constipation? Pain? " "No, I take too much to defecate" "... Ok... How much? An hour?" "F... Fifteen minutes" "Get out" "But some stranger on the internet said it's too much" "GET OUT"

by One_Policy 1 week ago

You are a middle manager aren't you

by Anonymous 1 week ago

it takes me longer than 5-10 minutes to move my bowels and seeing a doctor wouldn't help because i've seen doctors and they haven't helped. not every medical problem is one where you go and they give you a magical pill and it fixes the problem

by Laurianneaufder 1 week ago

Spoken like someone who doesn't have a heated bidet. Lol

by Complex-Performer-51 1 week ago

OP is a waffle stomp enthusiast

by Anonymous 1 week ago

It's rare that I see an actual unpopular opinion here but god damn is this a weird take.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

This isn't an unpopular opinion, it's ignorant and foolish.

by Specialist_Speed3028 1 week ago

Same reason anyone cares about any of the opinions expressed here?

by carmellavon 1 week ago

Agree on the thinking about toilet seats but Jesus dude, die you really have to be that harsh to your brother?

by NetMelodic 1 week ago

There are warm toilet seats lol? Ppl will invent anything.

by Junior64 1 week ago

This isn't an unpopular opinion, it's just nonsensical. No one is spending 45 mins on the toilet because their toilet seat is more comfortable. People do that because they're on their phone. Why not want a better toilet seat for the 5-10 minutes you spend on the toilet daily?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

My toilet seat is a bed of nails

by Anonymous 1 week ago

If you are going to get an uncomfortable seat, why even get a seat in the first place? I say get something comfortable or go seatless. Indeed, there are lots of different types of seats—could be made from wood, plastic, metal—but there's only one way to not have a seat. So if the choice is seatless or seated, what do you choose?

by PumpkinMinute 1 week ago

Taking my time bro. I have no need to rush and I already learned that if it's not all out I'm revisiting in 20 minutes

by Anonymous 1 week ago

It's not just toilet seats. The obsession with making every aspects of our lives as comfortable as possible, is a problem.

by Grahamgregorio 1 week ago

There are moments when you feel called out. It's me. right now. Good job!

by Guidocollier 1 week ago

Yes because everyone has the same body

by Kuhlmanlorena 1 week ago

You completely missed the point as to why guys take so long to poop.

by Opposite-Kick 1 week ago

5 minute timer, then the seat starts shocking you

by Anonymous 1 week ago

So, are you against toilet seats or against fancy and comfy toilet seats? Cause I can agree with the second, but I was very confused when reading your title and thinking it was the first.

by Lillie28 1 week ago