I definitely agree, but this is really just about my frustration with people who have way, way higher standards for their partner than they do of themselves when it comes to what they're looking for — and become incredibly upset that they're "alone" when their physical standards are so high

by Anonymous 1 week ago

You're not wrong at all. I had a male friend just like this

by Anonymous 1 week ago

One of my coworkers says he's only with his long term partner because "we can't all just change relationships whenever we want" Conversation came up while I was quizzing him about how his GF felt about him going to the strippers with the boys after work. People do the strangest things to other people.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Although I don't see myself in any way "qualified" enough to talk about relationships, I've been thinking about how odd attractiveness is demonized, yet it is also a common way people assess partners on a first meet up. There should be a logical and reasonable way to look at this, right? Well 1) obvious healthiness (and some not so much). 2) Individual expression. There are reasons why we want to be in certain types of clothing. Also dressing sharp shows that you care how you look, and humans like to talk about themselves, which don't have to be selfish at all. You don't have to be completely selfless to be kind, you can have desires, goals, and boundaries to tend to for yourself... and 3) To make sure you get that job interview. Also make sure you give a killer handshake. Again I'm pretty inexperienced, so critiques are appreciated.

by labernathy 1 week ago

Yeah totally. Incels are evidence of this.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Is that really unpopular? Isn't "looks don't define character" what everyone has been saying since forever?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

IMO conventionally unattractive people might be even more judge about appearances than conventionally attractive or middle ground people because they have this image that attractiveness will somehow fix all their problems so they will put that trait on a pedestal and judge others for it

by Anonymous 1 week ago