+40 Adversity does not make people tougher, amirite?

by Anonymous 1 month ago

Its a question of degree.

by HairyAddition2788 1 month ago

exactly. some adversity is good and gets you to dig deep and become better. overwhelming adversity just overwhelms

by No_Stranger2508 1 month ago

And what it is Like you can have a super easy like then own bad day you have a life changing injury. That just sucks

by AcceptableHost5518 1 month ago

It can make people tougher tho. It's made me tougher. Yeah I'm still vulnerable and susceptible to pain the trauma that I went through. It doesn't make me less tough. Yes it is harmful to make people seem like they HAVE to be strong or they SHOULD be strong after going through stuff. But there is no question that surviving hardships does give you strength. It's a problem to dismiss someone's feelings of weakness or vulnerability though despite their struggle.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

I'd say it depends entirely on the person. If there is a will for healing, then you can learn and become stronger from any experience.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

I think it depends on the personality of the person going through it.

by Radiant_Bee_2432 1 month ago

Idk I read the biography ‘unbroken' and my view entirely changed on that.

by Naderrosalia 1 month ago

It's not the adversity itself, but the getting through it.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

getting through it can be so exhausting and unpredictable, though, that the prospect of ever having to get through it again seems incredibly arduous.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

Adversity makes you stronger, but you're taking it to the extreme. Wind makes a tree stronger, but a hurricane tears it down. Most science confirms light adversity is how to get stronger, and is even fun. This is why you have skill based matchmaking in video games

by Anonymous 1 month ago

I wish I was totally incorrect. There would be significantly less suicide rates in this world if I were.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

Depends on the person, and what the adversity is. Some people cope better than others, and some forms of adversity are worse than others. Adversity can make people tougher, but it can also have the opposite effect.

by Ok-Bicycle 1 month ago

Neuroscience and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) have the data that proves mental resistance training works.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

I grew up in a toxic and abusive family. "Men don't have emotions" (except for anger) mentality. I'm a much better person today than I was growing up, but I'm okay with confrontation (standing up for myself) when needed and that's probably the only thing I'm grateful for. That, and a high pain tolerance.

by Pourosshayna 1 month ago

It depends on the adversity and on the person. Some people can use it to climb up, others crumble.

by Veumrory 1 month ago

It depends on the person. One of my friends committed suicide when she couldn't handle life struggles anymore. My other frriend is living her life, and I feel like out of all the people I've meet/befriended she had the worst life out there. I can't imagine being pimped out by your mom.

by Clear_Chicken 1 month ago

Adversity doesn't give you the choice. So it is basically cope or die and then you have survivor bias. So it isn't so much that it make people tougher but that other people are eliminated and that when its hard for everybody, people wont listen as much to everyday small problem and consider them big.

by SuchAdhesiveness419 1 month ago

Idk.. But i do know that i domt believe that "what doesnt kill you makes you stronger" because there are things that do just weaken you and being told you arw stronger because of it feels patronizing because it seems like that narrative is just so spectators can feel better about it. When in reality, there are just people who have horrible lives, constantly crumble, and die horribly because they never healed enough to get "stronger". But ig that can also depend on perspective. Like you dealt with so much crap that you are flabberghasted at the minor things that irritate some people. While others who deal with so much trauma that the only thing they outwardly care about are the little things because they shove the rest down and the little irritations are the only way to release some of that pressure. So idk but ig i agree with you.

by Ok-Woodpecker-8710 1 month ago

I think it's not about if, but about how much. A little bit of adversity, as in a normal, manageable amount that is an inevitable part of every person's life is a part of building resilience. Those who have never experienced any hardship at all do tend to do worse in really tough situations than people who have had a little, but there is a limit. Too much at once can break a person. How much is too much can differ from person to person.

by Anonymous 1 month ago

Exactly. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. The easiest option is to give up because it makes no difference.

by Blickboris 1 month ago

I read a quote recently to the effect of "Suffering doesn't make you better. Suffering just makes you suffer."

by Anonymous 1 month ago

This is exactly what I'm talking about.

by Anonymous 1 month ago