You CAN be good friends with your coworkers, amirite?

Nah im 34 and I dont want to make friends at work. Very rarely does a co worker interest me enough to talk to them about anything other than work. My friends outside of work, wife and daughter are all i need. I dont care what anybody else does

by Armstrongjett 2 days ago

What I always found strange about this is that people are very happy to have friends with randoms they sat next to year 9 geography, who have nothing in common beyond being the same age and same zip code, but completely against being friends where you kinda by definition have similar interests, motivations, and life paths. I used to work in strategy for a large bank, and it was refreshing to be able to talk about things like macro trends, interest rates etc, because for most people, they're not interested in talking about it, but for those who are, it is very hard to find likeminded people.

by Ok-Agent-8909 2 days ago

Yup. People who think that are either toxic colleagues or work in toxic environments

by Sad_Vermicelli 2 days ago

Sure, you can be. The problem happens when people expect everyone they work with to be a friend.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

But then everyone complains "it's so hard to make friends as an adult 😩"

by Anonymous 2 days ago

being introverted myself, it still is hard

by Alive-Option 2 days ago

I think it's fine to make friends that you share common interests with and you'd hang out with outside of work, but it's probably best not to become so close that you share personal things about your life or ask them any personal questions. In most cases, It's just best to keep work friendships professional until one of you leaves that employer

by Amarawolf 2 days ago

It's just best to keep work friendships professional until one of you leaves that employer I think it depends on the type of job. A white collar job where you work in management? Sure. But I know other types of jobs where people go out to the bars together or even clubbing. I work with a bunch of nurses and they like to do things like that together in their off time. My cousin is a teacher and one of her best friends works at the same school as her.

by EfficientSlide2086 2 days ago

Yep, coworkers from 25 years ago are still good friends. We've seen each other through weddings, kids and funerals.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Is this really an unpopular opinion? Feels very specific to the very specific corporate environments that are of the "cut throat nature." Most people avoid those work environments in the long-run, making this an unpopular unpopular opinion.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It seems to be an unpopular opinion online. I often see the narrative of "Your coworkers are not your friends."

by EfficientSlide2086 2 days ago

Thats because its the truth and always has been

by Armstrongjett 2 days ago

"Can be" is not the same thing as they are Most coworkers are not friends and very rarely does one pop up that should even be given the time of day

by Armstrongjett 2 days ago

By that logic no one is your friend, but they CAN be. Being a coworker doesn't make people friends, just as being classmates doesn't make people friends. Your second sentence is probably dependent on the workplace environment. I'm sure it's valid, as it's probably stemming from your experience, but not one many others could relate to

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Is this unpopular?

by Curious-Project 2 days ago

I don't go to work to make friends, but if I do then great. ETA I met my wife at work and we've been together for nearly 12 years now. We also worked together for the first three years.

by Easy-Mousse-7483 2 days ago

Work friends can turn into real friends it just depends on the environment.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

People who say this have an old school mindset, or they are just pricks. IMO the only time it isn't okay to be friends with co workers, is if you are in a supervisor position. But regular equals? Yeah. Friend it up.

by Additional-Eagle-895 2 days ago

Working in healthcare it's common for coworkers to become close. Lots of times nightshift will all go to the bar for breakfast after work at like 6am. It's just a different kind of job that other people just don't get

by Brainwisozk 2 days ago

Yeah, in my years of working in healthcare, there have been a lot of bar nights. There have also been plenty of get-together events at people's homes where a lot of people get a little too tipsy, but we still have fun. And a lot of movie nights. Like you said, its a different kind of job that people don't get.

by EfficientSlide2086 2 days ago

I feel like its more of an office thing. I was friends with a decent amount of people while working warehouse jobs. I cant speak for other types of jobs

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Healthcare is pretty close knit. I think a lot of it has to do with the teamwork aspect of the job and maybe some trauma bonding.

by EfficientSlide2086 2 days ago

I don't think this is unpopular

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Some of my best friends are former coworkers and I'm good friends with several of my current coworkers. It's totally normal.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I actually live with my coworker, it's going well. I also met my partner at work lol

by WhereasNo6471 2 days ago

Sure, you "can" end up being actually good friends with your coworkers. But it doesn't mean you should.

by Dry_Measurement6457 2 days ago

But it doesn't mean you should. If you hit it off with someone, then you totally should.

by EfficientSlide2086 2 days ago

You can be friends with whoever you want. Or not friends with whoever you want. That is the benefits of being a human!

by DistributionHot3359 2 days ago

I agree. It's just that you can't be friends with someone where power dynamics are involved (ie: your boss or direct report)

by Anonymous 2 days ago

We're social creatures, if you can't make friends in the place you spend the MAJORITY of your time, the problem might be you. Discernment is important, obviously.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

The problem for me is... I'm their boss 😭 the moment anyone thinks I'm giving anyone preferred treatment it'll be an HR nightmare and I'll be fired.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It depends on the type of work. Teachers can be friends, they aren't competing against each other. Office jobs you have to be a little more careful because I've had people chuck me under the bus in a heartbeat for a promotion or a step up.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Did you get extra pay for being the stand in manager or did you do it to be a good team player? You seem to be dumping very hard for this company in which you aren't even really a manager

by Sylviaweissnat 2 days ago

I was already getting time and a half for my time there, and I could've said no. My manager at the time had gone to a meeting and would be back in only an hour or so. I had a choice, stand in as manager or call our AGM to stand in instead. I didn't mind it, being manager essentially just gave me the authority to do what I already had been doing at the company because I liked doing it, mostly inventory audits and whatnot.

by Ok-Armadillo8127 2 days ago

I completely agree with you, but the friendship you're describing is confounded by a power dynamic (manager & employee) which shouldn't happen in the first place. I can't see how the problems you described would relate to 2 employees on the same level, unless one is promoted to a position that holds power over the other.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Yes you "can" However I dont "want" to

by Armstrongjett 2 days ago