Being happy in life is a privilege. Some have it, some don't. amirite?

People who've faced extreme hardship or lack traditional privileges have still found ways to live meaningful, joyful lives. That doesn't mean it's easy or equally accessible, but it does mean happiness isn't solely handed out at birth like a fixed trait.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

So people who never achieve happiness, is it more about their lack of effort then?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Or their outlook on life. People who have alot early in life and then make poor decisions and are broke the rest of their life will likely not be happy ever again but people who were always broke and learned to enjoy the little things will be happy even if they were to gain money and then loose it.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Right but couldn't you say the second person was privileged I a way? Or predestined for a place of happiness the first wasn't?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

No. We have free will. Everyone is privileged in some way compared to everyone else. For instance, you're privileged compared to me because you are better and making ridiculous arguments that only make sense to you and self justification. I am not good at that.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Fair lol. But I'm guessing you are a happy person, even if remotely.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I am depression and live with chronic pain/ health problems. I don't believe in permanent privilege everything is situational and times of sadness and happiness come and go. Happiness wouldn't mean a thing if you've never experienced sadness. It would just be indifference

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Sorry to assume, but It's just I've never had real happiness beyond fleeting moments, which where somewhat forced in their own ways. Feels like happiness is not just unattainable, but fully unrecognizable.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It's not possible to be happy all the time. Emotions change for a reason. It's called life, and you have to pursue what makes you happy. Don't wait for the world to hand it to you. Alot of happiness comes from doing the thing that will bring you joy and takes you putting in effort. I also feel you are confusekng being positive with being happy.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I suppose that's the core of my argument. Some people are either given happiness, or given the ability to find it. Some aren't. Pursuing that makes you happy is a privilege some people don't have.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Who is the privileged one between a wealthy miserable person and a poor happy person? Everyone is privileged in some way if you're trying to compare people like that.

by Critical_Scar_2541 2 days ago

Not necessarily. It's not always about effort, and definitely not about blaming individuals for their pain. For some, trauma, mental illness, or systemic barriers can be so overwhelming that happiness feels unreachable. That doesn't mean they're lazy or not trying, it means their starting point is different, and their road may be longer or steeper. The point is that happiness isn't only granted by luck or genetics. It can be influenced by those things, yes, but also shaped over time, through support, healing, or even just moments of peace. Effort matters, but so do circumstances. It's not either-or.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

then tell me why the most at peace and grateful people i've met are the ones with the most difficult challenges in their life. it doesn't make sense until you are in their shoes

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It's about purpose. They got it, others don't.

by Pattie53 2 days ago

Would you say peace is the same as happiness?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

i guess i would argue so. what else are people desiring?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I'd argue happiness requires fulfillment. You can have peace and still hate your life

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I don't know about that. If you are at peace with how things are and are grateful for it all, good and bad, does that not make you fulfilled? Or, would you say everyone who gave up on some dream is unhappy?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I think the feeling of being left out of life will always be unhappy, regardless of peace

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I mean sure. Do you think you have to be happy all the time to be happy? Some people are grateful that they ended up surrounded with the people they love, and wouldn't change a thing

by Anonymous 1 day ago

No. Happiness certainly isn't eternal. But I think there is a certain combination of circumstance and mind that some people can't accomplish. Some have one, without ever having the other.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Sure, but that still depends on your definition of happiness. Is it a certain income, a certain home, a certain number of friends, a level of achievement?

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I've always defined happiness as the desire to wake in the morning. It's a pretty simple definition, but it's all I'm striving for

by Anonymous 1 day ago

If you are feeling resentful and have feelings of being left out, I think definitionally you are not at peace. You could be in the exact same situation but think "wow I wanted to be friends with those guys but it turns out they're jerks. Oh well I guess I'll move on to the next thing."

by Critical_Scar_2541 1 day ago

I suppose you're right. I find it hard to believe that someone could find peace purely on their own

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I agree. I take it a step further to say it is a privilege to find such peace, a privilege some do not have or get

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Yeah, I hear what you're saying. I'm not opposed to trying it. Admittedly I'm at a point where I've given up all hope of ever having happiness or anything close to it. But I still believe in the ability to make peace with that

by Anonymous 1 day ago

No no no no no

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Delulu

by Own_University_9520 1 day ago

Would you agree, in a self fulfilling way, someone could burn enough bridges that they burn their chance at happiness, Thus abandoning the privilege to be happy?

by Anonymous 1 day ago

My point is that the end result of being happy can be outside of someone's control, regardless of why they do or don't do in life.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Unless you are so severely depressed that you can't feel happiness and need help. Everyone can be happy. The poorest people can be happy, people who are discriminated against can be happy, stupid people can be happy. Everyone feels happiness, it's natural and is not at all a privilege.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

You know what's funny about unpopular opinions? No one cares 😭

by Diligent_Desk 1 day ago

Wtf

by Sad_Emergency 1 day ago

Some people have the privilege of wealth, some good looks, and some happiness.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

How so?

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Happiness is a state of mind. Some people's circumstances can make it more challenging; some people's attitude can make ignore challenging. Start with keeping an attitude of gratitude and build feom there.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I agree to a point. But I guess I diverge at the point that happiness is inherently tied to external sources. And if you lack the capacity to change those circumstances, you lack happiness

by Anonymous 1 day ago

The assumption would be that those circumstances changed you would automatically be happy. And that is not true.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Maybe not entirely true, yes. But its hard to say that the external has no impact

by Anonymous 1 day ago

True. I would add though, some people have everything and are unhappy, while others have very little and can be happy with that. Happiness is a slippery eel.

by AmbitiousTomato6664 1 day ago

That's probably the best counter. But I suppose it depends on how we define happiness.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Some will win, some will lose, some are born to sing the blues.

by jana14 1 day ago

It's true some people are just born with clinical depression. Some people's baseline happiness is just lower than others. Yet some people are born very underprivileged and can still find joy in life. It may be harder for some people who are stuck in the hole, but you really do shape your reality, at least the perception of it. If you're finding yourself unhappy, you need to change what is in your power to change. Put down the phone and find a hobby. Make a friend. Walk across your city. Get a pet. Sell everything you own and move to another country. Anything but sitting around and stewing on the fact that you are miserable will undoubtedly help you be less miserable.

by Critical_Scar_2541 1 day ago

My point is that the very ability to do what you just described could still leave someone empty of happiness if they aren't privileged to it.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I suppose all we have is comparisons. But I think my point is that to be happy is beyond the ability of the individual

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Are you saying happiness is some sort of innate talent that only some people have?

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Basically. Some have it, some don't. Some have more of the "talent" some have less

by Anonymous 1 day ago

It's part decision, part experience and part gratitude. Sure some people have a chemical imbalance. For most though, it's up to you to decide how you think about things. So yeah, unpopular opinion alright.

by Cold_Tennis 1 day ago

Fully agree. Some people's lives are completely incapable of being happy by no fault of their own. Some may find moments of joy but they won't achieve general happiness. You also have the fact that some people's brain are wired, physically and/or mentally, to always be unhappy. No amount of positive thinking, affirmations or even therapy will fix it.

by OwlPast4274 1 day ago

First person to agree lol. Well put

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Would you say you are happy? Or have been, or could be? I'm in a similar boat, and I firmly believe happiness is off limits to me.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

That sounds great. I hate to assume anything or say I know you in any way. But I'd hesitantly say you might be privileged to happiness. Even if a little.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

You need to try to be happy. Happiness doesn't just come.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

My point is even with effort, the unprivileged will always lose

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I suppose, I think maybe the main point could be reduced to good health being a privilege. If you work at it and happiness doesn't come that just straight up depression. There are people who are naturally more melancholy than others for sure that's true. Do you think having a positive personality or outlook is privilege?

by Anonymous 1 day ago

privilege of race is hilarious. no one is "given" a race. that would assume something is picking from several races and they somehow magically bestow that race on you.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

It's just an example. The point remains the same.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

its not an example at all

by Anonymous 1 day ago

Privilege kind of definitionally isn't picked (or easy to be arbitrarily change), otherwise everyone would just pick "the good one". If being healthy is being privileged, then no one would choose to be sick. You aren't given your health records and no one wants to get cancer. Not getting cancer kind of is is being magically bestowed good health.

by Critical_Scar_2541 1 day ago

Privilege can also be the thief of happiness as expectations change and dopamine receptors dull. Someone in Africa may get extreme joy from receiving a meal or small necessity, where someone far more well off in the west feels impoverished. The extreme example is the celebrity millionaire who has everything the world has to offer but is still miserable. They end up killing themselves because there is nothing left to hope for.

by mikelpollich 1 day ago