Telling someone who's been in a horrific accident and survived that they're "lucky" is disrespectful and should not be normal, amirite?

It's literally luck to survive lol

by Anonymous 2 days ago

But incredibly unlucky to nearly die

by Anonymous 2 days ago

This. When I showed people the photo of my car wreck, they usually said "you're so lucky to get out of that alive!" And I can't blame them for that.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

what else would you call it?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

My biggest issue is when it's a group incident and if one person is 'lucky' it was divine intervention. So God is happy to kill 10 other people, but he has bigger plans for you? That's just ridiculous.

by DiscountLegitimate 2 days ago

Considering most people don't go through freak accidents, I wouldn't say it's lucky to not go through one I feel like you're conflating luck with something being good

by Bell68 2 days ago

Have once been the patient in a similar situation. Answered the people who were walking around perfectly healthy telling me how lucky I was, by saying, I'd trade my luck for yours.

by Graciela84 2 days ago

Maybe they also mean "I am glad you're still here."

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It's also just not what you want to hear after surviving something terrible. If I almost die in some accident, I wouldn't want to hear people saying "You're so lucky!" It would just make me more scared, as if it could happen again at any time

by Independent-Room 2 days ago

Context indeed ;-) If the first thing they say while you're still in hospital is "lucky man!" then probably yes. If they acknowledge that the accident was horrible and later say that it was luck that the outcome wasn't worse, that's already something different.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Like anything, it's situational Probably shouldn't tell them they're lucky as they're waking up from the coma. Better to tell them after the 1-year anniversary of the accident

by Anonymous 2 days ago

The freak accident is bad luck, surviving despite it is good luck.

by That_Effective 2 days ago

Sometimes people have high impact accidents and they walk out unscathed...that's pretty lucky. Having your jaw decimated isn't that lucky.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

a better way of phrasing it would be "It goes without saying I would rather it had never happened. That said, I'm glad that you made it out alive."

by Adept-Ebb6456 2 days ago

They're not saying the having the accident is lucky - they're saying that surviving it is, that's different

by igoyette 2 days ago

OP is the type to tell that person that they shoukd have died in the accident.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

So if you had kids, and their school burned down killing most of the children you'd feel about the same whether they died or survived? You wouldnt feel luckier if your kids survived?

by Botsfordmalika 2 days ago

I think there would be a wild mix of emotions in that case.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Honestly I agree. I was in a traumatic car accident about 5 years ago, and everyone told me i was lucky it wasn't worse / I wasn't killed, and honestly, i hated that sentiment, it felt like it was diminishing the event. Like, yeah, I was not seriously injured and did not die, but no, I wasn't "lucky". I still struggle mentally with the trauma to this day, and it used to be a hell of a lot worse. The person themself can say that, but telling someone who's just been in a serious / traumatic event that theyre "lucky" does feel wrong and a bit like its diminishing the trauma they likely have endured

by Anonymous 2 days ago

If anyone considers the person fortunate in any way for surviving an accident, it's better that they come to that realization through their own reflection on their experience. Everyone may have different perspectives after going through some event, especially if it's a situation where they are still alive but permanently disfigured or have to live with chronic intense pain as a result.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Yes, but people are people. Often they mean "I am so glad you are still there", when they say "you had a guardian angel" or " you were so lucky".

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I have no doubt that people may mean well or even say those types of things thinking they are helpful or because they don't know what else to say. That doesn't change how it might be received.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

It's about considering being alive being a good thing. Unless you think she'd be better off dead why wouldn't you call surviving something that just as easily could have killed her luck?

by gottliebmyrtle 2 days ago