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Honestly packages should come with a label on the front that says "do not throw away until you read the directions"...it would save me the trouble of going back to get it out out of the trash.
Watching cartoons in a super hero t-shirt while eating a bowl of Fruit Loops extends your life 13.35 minutes for each instance you do it.    At least that's what I just made up.

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There are occasions where your subtlety has the tendency to be quite explicit.

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<b>There is a place you can touch someone that will drive them crazy.</b> <em>Where is it?</em>

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<b>What do you do on a lovely Sunday afternoon? Attend a make-belief tea party thrown by your tiny niece.</b> <em>Does life get <b>any</b> better than this?</em>

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<b>Could you burn a dollar bill?</b> <em>I asked this on SH once; ppl got very upset....</em>

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<b>Cops.</b> They have a lot of responsibility...but they don't get enough support. <em>What more support could they use?</em>

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Some singers are a shame to our country... *coughs (Justin Bieber)

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Whoever said kindness pays has obviously never met my bill collectors😒

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