You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

90% agree
10% disagree
Post

-Shoot everyone in the airport to cancel all flights.
-Steal plane fuel.
-Add banner to the towers that says "NOT world trade center".
-Wipe peanut butter on the plane, so the pilots woul be like "Shit. I can't fly because there's peanut butter on my plane!"
-All of the above

+185188386 Reply

Serg Serg

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

16% agree
84% disagree
Post

This makes my inner grammar Nazi curl up in the fetal position and sob tears of agony.

+340342278 Reply

Teehee

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

78% agree
22% disagree
Post

Awwh, yeah. Be Thou, O God, Exalted High comes on and I'm like, "Everybody, this is my shit!!"

+3143162118 Reply

SoyChelsea SoyChelsea

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

97% agree
3% disagree
Post

The only thing my **** ed class could stop giggling long enough to agree on was that the female reproductive system totally looks like a cow's head.
http://ctrlv.in/57003
http://ctrlv.in/57004
I rest my case.

+676725 Reply

ctiscooler ctiscooler

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

97% agree
3% disagree
Post

inb4 a comment with the f word used as a verb, interjection, adjective, noun, adverb, metaphor and punctuation all at the same time.

+1515 Reply

Nick Nick

In response to “inb4 a comment with the f word used as a...

I will ** use the word whichever way I want to. My parents heard me say when I was younger, and I was grounded. ! Then I ran away and came across a raccoon and it was another raccoon and I found that I was lost in the forest and realized I was so fuckingly . But it was okay because I didn't give a . A ** is a waste of time.

+19197 Reply

Sobriquet

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

11% agree
89% disagree
Post

Who's "they"?

+15172 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Who's "they"?

Them. As in the ones who shot JFK. The ones who built the Easter Island statues. The ones who made Stonehenge. The ones who sunk Atlantis. The ones who built the pyramids. The ones who are in Area 51. The ones who found the Fountain of Youth. The ones who hacked the Playstation Network. Them. They say it.

+16716773 Reply

CapedCrusader CapedCrusader

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

15% agree
85% disagree
Post

Leave huge tips at cheap diners to freak out the waitstaff. Buy a homeless guy a fully stocked RV, videotape it, and see if you can make it go viral. Set up a charity under an obviously fake name, something like "Ivanna Tinkle," and watch the media have fun with it. Start your own gameshow. Fill a small pool with jello or corn starch and water like you always wanted to do when you were a kid. Hire a bunch of people and prank a small town somehow, like leaving an identical lawn gnome on every doorstep, or organizing a huge impromptu scavenger hunt. Have a ball pit installed in your home. Have a superhero costume custom-made and go bungee jumping in it. Walk into a small store and announce that you want to buy everything in it. Stop people on the street and offer them large sums of money for their clothing. Scatter quarters all over a playground and watch small children have their days made when they find them.
Just think about it. I'm sure you'll find ways to have fun.

+186190485 Reply

FlyingGuineaPig FlyingGuineaPig

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

97% agree
3% disagree
Post

One day I'll tell my grandchildren about a time when the internet was uncensored and users roamed free within its borders like majestic lions across the grasslands. I'll tell them how we had to type things out instead of using the neural links implanted in our brain stems, how we had to scroll down through dozens of menus, both ways, with a stalled connection to find what we wanted, and I'll remind them that children these days are so ungrateful. I'll tell them how we had programs that connect you to another user across the world and let you talk about your different experiences, and when they ask me if I ever saw anyone's **** between the philosophical debates I'll laugh and find a clever way to avoid answering, because the elderly are entitled to their secrets. I'll complain about my carpel tunnel and advanced arthritis in both thumbs, and at thanksgiving I'll remind them to be thankful for mind upload text. I'll keep my dear old friend, my laptop, on a shelf beside the grandfather clock, where it will gather dust because it's been broken for years and the parts are no longer made, and the children will stare at it in wonder and marvel, "The screen really does fold up!"

+15815880 Reply

FlyingGuineaPig FlyingGuineaPig

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

79% agree
21% disagree
Post

People laughed at my opinion that Lord of the Rings would be much better if they replaced the One Ring with a soup can.

+9395222 Reply

Garren_the_Dragon Garren_the_Dragon

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

99% agree
1% disagree
Post

Actually, Anthony is a mythical creature known only to those who visit amirite. His current whereabout are unknown, but he was last seen in a pineapple under the sea. Several accounts describe Anthony as a polka-dotted, six-armed, scuba-diving prostitute. He is known to travel with an assortment of creatures including unicorns, penguins, and lima beans. Once every blue moon, he emerges from the depths of the ocean atop a sperm whale. The Anthony creature emits a loud howling noise similar to an injured mongoose. If you hear this noise or see a creature similar to the one described, please call 1-800-HOLYSHIT.

+24425410101 Reply

DanielJames DanielJames

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

95% agree
5% disagree
Post

But "Jake?" Oh boy, she's going to have a field day with that one!

+81821 Reply

Tallglassofwater Tallglassofwater

In response to “But "Jake?" Oh boy, she's going to...

Jake, Jake, my dear Jake
I want to stab you with a rake
And dump your body in a lake
Or bake it in a birthday cake
I hope you get bitten by a snake
Your empty promises were so fake
You really made my poor heart ache.

+360362299 Reply

EduardVonBock

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

94% agree
6% disagree
Post

This sounds like something elementary schools would play to help kids learn the days of the week: "Tomorrow is Sunday. And Sunday comes afterwards"

+5768112 Reply

theasexualsloth theasexualsloth

In response to “This sounds like something elementary schools...

Looks like you could do with the help bro

+4834852113 Reply

Anthony

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

72% agree
28% disagree
Post

No, one time I was having a really bad day...Olive Hornby was teasing me about my glasses. I ran into the bathroom stall and locked myself in there and cried. After the tears dripped away, I took a look at the wall and saw "You are perfect" written there and it made my day. Then, I opened the door as a confident young woman. As I walk out, I hear a boy's voice, I look and it was Tom Riddlle opening the Chamber of Secrets and letting the basilisk out. I died, but I died happy...all because of a girl scrawling "You are perfect" on the inside of a dirty bathroom stall.

+3633707105 Reply

DanielJames DanielJames

You disagreed. (Undo) (Show Numbers)

94% agree
6% disagree
Post

Shut up with your stupid **** goddamn post with your mother last night in your room and you were adopted ....face.

+3984002110 Reply

Anonymous

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