+2,461 It was perfect that Jesus waited three days to come back to life. If he had only waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't have even heard he died. They'd be all, "Hey Jesus, what up?" and Jesus would probably be like, "What up? I died yesterday!" and they'd be all, "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude... amirite?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

future POTD

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This post is legen- wait for it...

by Anonymous 14 years ago

DARY!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Woah, we really did have to wait for that.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Haha, I love how you worded this.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Except it was worded by someone else.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Dude, it's actually true. In the Jewish religion, you're not officially dead until day three, because otherwise they might just be in a coma or something.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

That makes a lot of sense. Hmm, learn something new everyday.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

OH MY. I love this. Please make it POTD. Seriously. Probably my favorite post EVER. Ah.... gotta love Jesus.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Not to ruin the joke or anything, but... Jesus never died and came back to life. LOL NOW I STARTED A RELIGION DEBATE WHAT NOW

by Anonymous 14 years ago

No, you didn't.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Quite to the contrary, actually. Scroll down a little bit.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

win troll is win.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

(Brett):He actually did, he came back in disguise and talked to apostles and certain people.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

What's your source? Some 2000 year old cave drawings?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

History Channel, probably. You know, where professional historians and archeologists find all kinds of information..

by Anonymous 14 years ago

LOL. Those shows are based off the Bible.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

To quote you: "Where's you're source?". They actually go to the places mentioned in the Bible (not just christians, Jews, Muslims, athiests, etc.) and look all the artifacts, places, buildings and writings, look at what they find, and try to figure out what happened, just like they were trained.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

You are fucking retarded. Ancient cave writings are not evidence for a fairy-tale-like story. If I wrote down on a piece of paper that I saw Superman flying around, and someone found it in 2000 years, it would be called a foolish story. So why should it be any different for a story about a guy who walks on water and comes back to life?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Some people actually believe in Christ. Ever heard the funny little statement everyone has their own opinions? It's time to start respecting them, please.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

amen

by Anonymous 14 years ago

When was the last time you saw an Atheist come to your door and try to give you a copy of the God Delusion? Christians are the ones forcing it down our throats.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

And you are trying to keep up the image that every Christian is a fundamentalist and is insane. Well guess what? We're not. Not every dang person who believes in God is trying to shove His word down your throat and convert you. So quit your assuming.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This wasn't even supposed to be "all religious" god dammit, it was a nice joke and you ruined it, so go back into your troll cave and shove a wand up your nose. thanks. kbye

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This wasn't even supposed to be a religious debate, as stated in my first comment, but NO, you feisty Christians gotta argue about everything.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Not supposed to be a religious debate? And this is coming from the person who decided to spark it? I don't believe it. Once again with the grouping and stereotyping. For every action there is an opposite and equal reaction. I'm applying this to this situation in which you piss someone off they're going to retaliate so quit it.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I believe at the moment, it is YOU who are shoving atheism down OUR throats.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

10 points for gryffindor

by Anonymous 14 years ago

We're not forcing down anyone's throats. We're spreading the Gospel message like Christ told us to.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

People kept records on paper with scribes, not in caves.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

@532932 (Brett): @532930 (fangirl12): If you see his previous comments, he WANTED to cause a debate. You're feeding him.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

there are records from the romans of Jesus in their execution records

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I really shouldn't add to this but... The earliest recordings in the Bible were not recorded at least until 80 years after the events. Things get twisted in very few years and during that time the average lifespan was at maximum half of what is is today, much often less. So even with historical evidence that he may have existed, the part where he was resurrected and son of God stuff could simply be ways to make him bigger. Emperors of the time were all considered to have come from a virgin birth, son of God, and many other of the things that Jesus was famous for. To put it simply: The Bible was created by people for people, and it is a completely inaccurate record of events. Jesus was cracked up to be more than he was, if he even was (although evidence does suggest that he did exist, just not as Gods son). This should put some peoples answers at rest.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Where'd you learn all this?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Books (God is not Great, God Delusion, etc. and some pro-religious books, just to make sure the facts were right :) yea I study this a bit...

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Wow, people liked your comment, but as soon as you replied with what your sources were, you got downranked. :/ Assuming that this is the same Anonymous.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

It was. Mannn but I worked hard on that comment... makes sense though, I wouldn't want someone reading too much on one side and then pretending to know all about it. I just found that a lot (not all) of the pro-god books had contradicting and bad evidence. :P I should stop commenting on this...

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Thanks. You know, technically though it makes sense that the earliest found recordings are from a few years after. Paper and scrolls don't usually last more than two-thousand years. Anyway, thanks for the reply :)

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Pretty much sums it up. Ten points and a gold star for you. ;)

by Anonymous 14 years ago

No, seriosuly, I really just wanna know.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

1. Like fangirl12 said, where'd you learn that? 2. I wish I could like bookmark your comment or something, it's brilliant. :)

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Thank you!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

For the record the latest book written in the bible was written by john, the beloved who was exiled to the island of patmos and was present during the time of Jesus Christ. Therefore the chance of him fabricating stories written is very unlikely since his works are primary sources. furthermore, it is unlikely that many of the bible chapters are fabricated relative to many other documents at the time. Also the bible is consider the most historical accurate book of its time.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

A minor quibble, but I've read (From Christian authors, but also independent sources) that the generally agreed upon dates for Mark (The earliest gospel written) around 70 and John (The latest gospel written) around 90-100. More importantly, in a historical context, 40-80 years is *next to nothing*. For example, in the case of Alexander the Great (356 - 323 BC) the nearest surviving source we have to his death was written by Greek called Diodorus in the 1st century BC, around 300 years after his death. Furthermore, mythical or legendary elements do not show up in accounts of Alexander until much later. In the case of Jesus, the gospels were written by people who knew him personally (Matthew, John) or knew someone who knew him personally (Mark was an associate of Peter, Luke was an associate of Paul). The gospels more than stand up to scholastic standards which are enough to classify any other historical account as fact.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I don't agree with you. The Apostles were guided by the Holy Spirit to write the Gospels and they had an above average lifespan because of it

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Haha. Funny. But apparently there is some evidence that a man DID live in Jerusalem at that time who WAS named Jesus and was thought to be the "Son of God" and "Prophet." Now, whether or not he really was is the debate. But... yeah, I bet you're going to get a lot of crap for that from Christians with sticks up their butts.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Now we're feeding him...

by Anonymous 14 years ago

With sticks!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

We're only defending what believe in, cut the insults please

by Anonymous 14 years ago

(True Blue<3): Dude. I'm LDS. I'm probably a more devote Christian than you. But there ARE a lot of people who feel the need to argue with atheist or non-believers and get offended. Who cares if he thinks Jesus is a hoax? Do you think your opinion will make him think otherwise? No. It'll just upset him and turn him bitter.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Trolliest troll comment ever.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

lol i love this post! it's worded pefectly "you look alive to me" hahaha

by Anonymous 14 years ago

People need to let things be. Nobody asked you to go put your two cents in there and start arguing where it isn't wanted. I love this post and i l♥ve Jesus.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

If no one asked for your two cents their wouldn't be a comment section Would there?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

*there. That's true, yeah. But there is a point where you're stating your opinion then there's one for trying to go and start something that doesn't need to be there for any reason. Quote: "lol I started a religion debate what now." That's just immature.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Well the guy who said that is just starting things for no reason. but what's amirite without some debate? Haha.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Exactly.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This post is hilarious btw.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Way to steal this quote from the tv show How I Met Your Mother.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Way to steal this quote from the tv show how I met your mother.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Especially since they didn't have Facebook or anything then

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I laughed when I read this

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This is my favorite Barney Stinson quote ever! A close second is "Go ho or go home!"

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I love this post

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I love Barney's explanation of the three days rule.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

the three days rule?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

The three days rule for calling a girl. I can't remember which episode but it's so funny

by Anonymous 14 years ago

oooh that rule lol

by Anonymous 14 years ago

(TalkingRice):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkmheRE9zi4&feature=related

by Anonymous 14 years ago

How I Met Your Mother rocks! I love Barney. You'd know by looking at my name :D

by Anonymous 14 years ago

This quote seems strangely familiar. I think my friend said this at the bar.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

BARNEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

by Anonymous 14 years ago

is a dinosaur from our imagination! When he's tall he's what we call a dinosaur sensation!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Sup.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

hahaha i went to your profile and the first thing it said was "Barney_Stinson is right 100% of the time." True Story.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

this is a facebook group :)

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I didn't know. I saw this while watching How I met your Mother cept I just shortened it.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

How I Met Your Mother!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I'm a Christian and I love this... lol. Especially how you worded it... lol

by Anonymous 14 years ago

finally post of the day! : D

by Anonymous 14 years ago

1000th like!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

HIMYM!!!!!! LOVE IT! but u took my post of the day >:(

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I thought this post was awesome until I saw someone say that you stole it from a television show. Now it's okay, but it's mostly just plagiarism.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Did the fact that the joke was made before actually make the joke any less funny?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

The fact that the person is claiming it as their own and/ or isn't crediting the orginial source makes it much less funny, yes.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

The follow up says "I love Barney Stinson. Thats about it" Even if you don't know who Barney is, it's quite clear that he isn't taking credit for the joke

by Anonymous 14 years ago

you think someone would write a huuggee book by hand just by making it up? yea. didnt think so

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Have you never been to a library or bookstore? D:

by Anonymous 14 years ago

hahahahahhah, oh snap. So true..

by Anonymous 14 years ago

How I met your mother. Barney Stinson = beast

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I'm glad you like me, brah.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

"First of all, we agreed never to say brah anymore, it was a fun weekend, we had a lot of laughs, but now it's over"

by Anonymous 14 years ago

YES! IT MADE IT! I was hoping this post would be POTD! Ah....

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I'm awesome. True story.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

You don't even get sick. When you get sick, you stop being sick and be awesome instead. True story.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Also, where the shame gland should be, there's a SECOND awesome gland. True story.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

**cue religious debate**

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I thought this post was stupid when I saw it on the just in page... Seeing it again, I've realized: I was so right.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

3 day rule! :D

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I love the lack of haters in this thread!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Barney Stinson. Is. Awesome!

by Anonymous 14 years ago

potd... REALLY? A religion debate... REALLY?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

random comment

by Anonymous 14 years ago