Somewhere, Lemony Snicket is sitting in his mansion, chuckling and saying, "I just mindfucked so many people..." amirite?

I can feel his dick fuckin my mind

Me: "Hey Bob, wanna go to the movies tonight with me and John?" Bob: "I totally would but I don't have a ride." Me: "Oh, I'll give you a ride." Bob: "Oh shootyou know, I don't have any money." Me: "Haha, no problem, I'll cover you." Bob: "Well actually I have homewo" Seriously, grow some balls and just say you don't want to go. amirite?

I HAVE HOMEWORK GOD DAMNIT

Meme is pronounced meem, mot mey-mey, amirite?

oh awkward... I always pronounced it as dew-pull-high-nee-sek-ma-chan-tra ........

It'd be weird if a new born boy's penis at birth was the size of a grown male's, but never grew anymore. Just think, the doctor cleans off your new born son and then says "Congratulations, he's about 8 inches! I'm sure you're proud," amirite?

That would not fit in a diaper...

Its gross if the girl in the relationship is hairier than the guy. And I'm not talking about the hair on your head. I mean chest, stomach, arms and legs. amirite?

Not saying I like it but ur just being a cunt cuz they can't help it

There is now a baby named "Facebook." That's just sad, amirite?
@Rawtoast it's probably Bob.

now there's a name we can all enjoy

I just remember Old Hippies Are High On Acid... And on calculators its always sin cos tan so u just correspond... Idk... Who wants to drop acid with me

The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. amirite?

This was so inspirational that I went to walmart and bought an xbox and black ops that I'm going to train for the army with it then I'm gonna go save some koalas in the war.

You have heard of meat pies but you've never had one. amirite?

Who the fuck has never had a meat pie

Why do people always tell you to "think positively"? You should think negatively. That way, everything will exceed your expectations and it can only go up from there, amirite?
The amirite icon (in your address bar) has colour! amirite?

It looks trashy

@1018891

its a plausible theory and it happens to be my opinion

There are millions of innocent kids who die from cancer every year. Some people are born with perfect health but squander it to smoke a nasty little stick. Smokers are selfish, amirite?

Selfish? Do u think them quitting smoking is going to help the kids? Smokers know that they might get cancer, that's their choice, its not selfish, just stupid

Perfect little girls, huh? Well Professor, WHAT ABOUT THE FINGERS? amirite?
We all have that friend who defies his or her racial stereotypes, amirite?

I know a fucking asian who is going to uni for ENGLISH?! Wtf is wrong with the world