There is no cool way to order at subway. amirite?

"I'll have a footlong, please. Ooh and also a 12-inch sandwich! I'm so nasty!" All said in an obnoxious gay voice.

Part of you wants to think that Heaven doesn't exist because the thought of your family watching over you while you masturbate is too much, amirite?

"That's my grandson! He's turned into a respectable young man over the years...and he's grown a bit too! Oh, and he...wait...what is he...no....OH! OH GOD NO!"