+677I got a letter in the mail today that said "Happy birthday, from 'you know who'"; why the fuck is Voldemort sending me letters? Amirite?
+1,741Jesus can walk on water. Humans are 75% water. I can walk on humans. Therefore, I am 75% Jesus, amirite?
+939If a girl's bra is called an over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder, wouldn't a guy's boxers technically be called an under-the-butt-nutt-hutt, amirite?
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+569Your phone has an automatic silent feature. It's activated by the lack of a social life, amirite?
+1,841"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dave." "Dave who?" Dave holds back tears as he realises his mother's Alzheimer's is getting worse. amirite?
+3,995When someone says "Thank you Captain Obvious" a good response is "You're welcome Lieutenant Sarcasm", amirite?
+1,077I'm not single, I'm in a long distance relationship with this girl who lives in my future. amirite?
+364If she's easy, she won't be worth it. If she's worth it, she won't be easy. If she's worth it, you'll wait for her. If you wait for her, you're woth it, amirite?