Fire breaths, eats, and grows—maybe if it were allowed to burn long enough, it would become self-aware too. amirite?

Or just becomes a morbidly obese POS

US history classes get slightly harder every year, amirite?

Why only US?

We are the next fossil fuel. amirite?

Ackshually... We won't be, because we will rot and decay. Fossil fuels exist because a long time ago there was no fungi to digest dead plants and animals. Now it is all just returned the the atmosphere as carbon dioxide.

If you're fortunate enough, your organs will spend their entire lifetime in complete darkness. amirite?
The jobs of many chefs and cooks would have been a lot easier if no one ever had taste buds and so no one could have ever differentiated the taste between an ice cream, a spicy gravy and a bitter medicine syrup... amirite?
We pay garbage companies to take things that belong to us. amirite?

They're taking old banana peels and dirty napkins, not our TVs and furniture.

We all have our inner voices, humans think, dogs woof, cats meow but DINOSAURS are probably screaming 24/7, amirite?
@TheLucidMan Dinosaurs have been dead 24/7 for a while.

Thats what they want you to think, I mean.. YCKGXGKFKDKTXKYCHCKHFGSTATUONFJIV

Animals that couldn't learn to swim either stayed away from the water or drowned. amirite?

What does that make Michael Phelps?

Adding the prefix "Shadow-" to any object makes it sound infinitely cooler. amirite?

Shadow dad left to pick up smokes when I was four

It's very likely that someone that you don't even know has masturbated thinking about you. amirite?
A peanut allergy is not a nut allergy, amirite?

Correct, a peanut is a legume

It's very likely that someone that you don't even know has masturbated thinking about you. amirite?
@William2626 How come?

Say someone sees you as you walk by each other and thinks your attractive, right? Well if they go home and masturbate old school, then they might picture you while they masturbate.

Electricity isn't used directly, amirite?

Except the electric chair?

You will never find a sane, gorgeous woman homeless, amirite?
@I can help. How hot are you?

I give myself a 6 but I've never bought my own drinks when out sooooo