+13A guy took his girlfriend to a football game for the first time. After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game. "Oh I really liked it" she said, "but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents." "What do you mean???" "Well I saw them flip a coin and 1 team got it and then for the rest of the game all they kept screaming was, " Get the quarter back, get the quarter back."
+10"joke" Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said," My son is a saint, he works hard, doesn't smoke, and he hasn't so much as looked at a woman in over two years." The other woman said, "Well my son is a saint himself. Not only has he not looked at a woman in over 3 years, but he hasn't touched a drop of liquor in all that time." "My word," the first woman said. "You must be so proud." "I am", the second woman replied. "And when he's paroled next month, I'm going to throw him a big party."
+9The ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry, doesn't exist. Amirite? ;-)
+12As I watched the dog chase his tail, I thought "dogs are easily amused;" then I realized I was "watching" the dog chase his tail.
Want to ask your own question? Make A Post No need to login!
+29Life's a whole lot easier when there's someone to help carry the load, even when you can carry it yourself.
+6If today were the last day of your life, would you want to do what you are about to do today? Steve jobs
+13OBSTACLE COURSE: You succeed at one thing and you move on to the next. When an obstacle is tough, you try harder. When an obstacle is insurmountable, you change course. But you never sit down and refuse to finish. Amirite?