In a relationship with Wolverine, getting fingered would have to be so stressful. amirite?

The anxiety might make you come harder.

The only aggression society rewards is white male aggression. amirite?

If you mean financially, no. Male aggression yes, in sports and combat. If you mean socially, no. Male agression is pretty frowned upon in daily life.

Because of toothpaste, mint is probably the most common taste in the world, amirite?

second the water theory. it's perceived to have no taste showing how common the taste is

One man completely ruined a mustache style for the entire planet. FOREVER. amirite?

Not ruined at all. Anyone can get their mustache style if they want to; people still do.

Disabled animals are considered cute but disabled humans are often made fun of. amirite?
@Dairyqueenemployee Where do you live where disabled people don't face any mockery?

"don't face any mockery" is way different than "often made fun of"

And urban Texas is the answer.

One day there will be something even more extreme than vegan and they will shame everyone even vegans and be even more annoying. amirite?
We will never see phone lines being cut in horror movies ever again. amirite?

Mobile phones with 1-2% will replace it as a way of creating tension/danger.

Women wake up and have to put their boobs in little pouches. amirite?