If we could shave fat like we could shave hair, we would definitely do it... amirite?

Fat takes some time to burn, so if I could shave off fat I'd use it to light a campfire or something.

It's possible that intelligent life on the brink of extinction elsewhere in the universe intends to colonize Earth after exterminating the local vermin — us. amirite?

Have you solved the Fermi paradox? I hope so because it's been burrowing into my brain since listening to the end of the world podcast by josh Clarke. I hate paradoxes!!!

It seems that fat bearded men are the biggest opponents to face masks. amirite?

I'm fat and bearded and I wear a mask... I feel offended

If public toilets were made to be less comfortable to sit on, we'd have way shorter lines, amirite?

You must not work in construction...

Anything can be cheese, depending on what you consider cheese. amirite?

Lay off the egg nog, dude

We drink 268.2 litters of saliva every year, but drinking a cup of it doesn't seem to appetizing. amirite?

swallows consciously

When Apollo 11 landed 2 people had to spend a week away from family and friends. Including the 2 day long space launch. amirite?

Water is wet

If you have to talk about semen at work, you have a really good job or a terrible job. No middle ground. amirite?

Have to? It's a privilege

If other species of humans still existed, species-ism would have probably been a thing. amirite?

The way we treat other animals...speciesism is definitely a thing.

Good morning to everyone except the people who believe everything they read on the internet, amirite?

Then i shall not believe it is a good morning!

Everyone will have broke at least two world records in their lifetime, youngest person on Earth and closest to death, amirite?

That's not what a world record is. You would have to be the youngest person ever, which is meaningless.

the sky gets it's blue color from water, but what make the water blue, amirite?

The sky

They are there for each other

What's on your tombstone will be your last tweet, amirite?

Oooh we blowing stuff up now? Count me in~

People crap on BMW drivers for being rude but not nearly enough contempt is heaped on Chevy pickup owners who are the most hostile drivers on earth, amirite?
@Dewanrachit Did I stutter?

Do you perhaps own a Chevy pick up?

One of the sneakily expensive parts of being an adult is building your own spice collection. amirite?

Get one of those lazy Susan's with the built in spice holders. $20. Spices included.