God_the_Almighty

Sure opposites attract. But there's a reason why no one says opposites stay together. amirite?
@potato22 Not that many comments on potd... Srry but i don't know where to close my account, since i don't want it anymore...

I'll remove it for you. All takes are a few simple steps.
Step 1: Go to my account settings.
Step 2: Click "Change Password"
Step 3: Mash random letters on the keyboard with your eyes closed
Step 4: Log out
Your welcome

I bet you had to read this twice, amirite?
@Favvkes You didn't read this comment twice, amirite?

I read it twice on purpose because I'm a serious douche like that.

It sucks to live in the shadow of your older brother or sister. Imagine if Jesus Christ had a little brother or sister. How do you live up to THAT? amirite?

Mary: "Steve, go to your room. You're grounded."
Steve: "But mom, Jesus started it! Why doesn't he ever get in trouble?
Joseph: "Steve, listen to your mother. Go to your room."
Steve: Under Breath "God, is Jesus like perfect or something?"

If you pretend to shake salt into your mouth, you can actually taste the salt, amirite?
Middle-school girls shouldn't have to wear tons of makeup. amirite?
@1468401

Please, son, tell me that was sarcasm. We didn't raise you that way.

If Adam and Eve did populate the world, then everything DID start with a big bang, amirite?
@DandyLion Adams really cool, except when he's a tool. Eve can't swim in a pool, because she's just a fool. But there is one...

The funny thing is the apple wasn't even special, I just told them that because I was bored and I can.

They should really make stomach medicines taste better, cause the last thing I want to swallow when I'm sick is something chalky and ass flavored, amirite?
Out of all of Santa's reindeer, the one that sounds most like a street name for crystal meth is all of them, amirite?
@Simon HOLY SHIT I JUST HEARD SOME GAY PEOPLE WANTED TO ADOPT This is an outrage - our orphanages aren't full yet!

What's next? Are we seriously going to let them join THE ARMY? God, the nerve of those people, trying to fight and die for our nation, even though they're DIFFERENT from us. Can you believe it?

I bet you had to read this twice, amirite?

At first I NW'd because I didn't get the joke, and than I realized I had read it about 5 times.

Xbox Gamertags: Proof why we aren't meant to name ourselves at birth. amirite?
Being the smartest person in the Kardashian family is like being the valedictorian of an Alabama high school, amirite?
Being a doctor must be way more exciting than being a dentist, because if someone gets sick or is having a baby on a plane or something, you can help them and be the hero. But if you're a dentist, I doubt this ever happens: OH GOD THIS PERSON HAS A CAVITY! IS ANYONE HERE A DENTIST!? amirite?

"OH MY GOD THIS LADY IS HAVING A HEART ATTACK! IS ANYBODY HERE A DOCTOR?"

"No, but I'm a dentist."

"....IS ANYBODY HERE AN ACTUAL DOCTOR?"

It would be cool if the commercial break was made up of one big commercial that included all the products you normally see in a commercial break. Like a family riding in a Ford Fusion go out to State Farm to get life insurance. One of the kids is playing with a Barbie doll in the car. She starts to choke on one of Barbie's shoes and they have to go to St. Mary's hospital. Then, once the child is revived, they end the day with dinner at Applebee's. Amirite?

It would be cool if they continued the story in the next break.
"Will the Charmin Bears ever learn to wipe their butts without leaving pieces behind? Tune it next commercial break to find out."

Gentlemen, for the next 2-3 weeks the best pick up line at any bar is, "What's Call of Duty?" You can thank me at the bachelor party. amirite?