How to get over your fear of the dark: As soon as you turn the lights off, start masturbating. No monster wants to see that shit. While doing it, stare at the corner and whisper, tenderly, “this is for you”, amirite?

This helped me get over my fear of crowded places too.

It would suck if Hitler actually meant "I hate Juice" but people misheard him, amirite?

-Did he say "Glass of juice" or "Gas the Jews"?
-I dunno, but he's in a pretty bad mood, so we'd best do both just incase.

I know why they call it Post of the Day. It's because the acronym is POTD, and if you sound that out, it sounds like "party", which is what a Post of the Day is, amirite?
@for those who disagree say "pot-d" its party with an accent!

(Miss.Brittany): What the hell kind of accent have you got?!

You find the fact that "Mickey Mouse" spelled backwards is "Satan" very unsettling, amirite?

I love the way people felt the need to comment that it doesn't, it's like they think the rest of us are just sitting here going "Spelling? Fuck that, I'm taking this guy's word for it."

Ariel from the little mermaid is the hottest disney princess, amirite?

Nala...
wary smilie
What?

Chaos is beauty, beauty is pain, pain builds strength; Order is safety, safety is comfortable, being comfortable keeps us from progress. So laws keep us from progress and make us weaker, amirite?

This post doesn't make sense, things which don't make sense cause confusion, confusion causes ignorance, ignorance causes hate, hate causes evil, evil causes fear, fear causes aggression, aggression causes war.
So this post must be responsible for war.
You cunt.

In Harry Potter, Hagrid seems to be a very indecisive person. For example, in the first movie, his little hut is just down the hill from Hogwarts, then each movie he relocates, some farther from the school, some closer. It's also pretty weird how the forest moves with it... amirite?

"I'm alright with the moving staircases and the tree that beats the shit out of things, but has anyone noticed that Hagrid's hut is sometimes slightly further away?"

You wonder how typing likeee thissss managed to catch on and how it even started, amirite?

"I don't have the heart to take my finger off this letter yet, it'l be like saying goodbye to the word I just typed, I'm gonna need a moment."

When a siblings moves out it's kind of like losing a toe. Sure there are some advantages and there's no overall down side, but every now and again you'll look at that place where your toe use to be and really wish that you could have it with you again, amirite?
@1712118

You can fit into slightly smaller spaces than you could before.
You have a secret place to store something toe-sized.
It's easier to squeeze into smaller shoes if they don't have your size.
Fun thing to show off at parties.
If you drop something heavy there is a lower chance of it hitting your toes than there was before.
It will teach your other toes a lesson.
It's probably one of the easiest ways to find out whether your limbs grow back.
If you ever became a fictional villain from 300 years ago and needed a nickname, you could be "Nine-toes [first name]" or "[first name] Nine-toes"
You'll never bang it on something again.

A recent study in USA revealed that 30% of male students at HARVARD university would be interested in raping someone. That's scary and messed up, amirite?
@swimlax Either that or they took analysis tests. "Do you often struggle to get someone to love you voluntarily, or do you...

That's hardly fair
"If someone tells you you can't have what you want, do you still want it?"
"Yes."
"He's a rapist."

You aren't allowed to be a Harry Potter fan unless you've read the books, amirite?

"Oh you watched the story when it was already in moving image format rather than looking at the stationary words and using those as guidelines to form the images in your mind? Well, you mustn't have enjoyed that enough for my standards." - People who should fuck off.

People who ask random people for smokes are pretty stupid. You never know what that person might give you, amirite?

Yeah, I learned my lesson that time when I asked someone for a smoke and they gave me a weasel and I tried to smoke it and it turned out it was a weasel with weasel disease and so now I'm a weasel.

I've only been seeing my girlfriend for about 2 weeks now, but she makes me feel like no other. I probably shouldn't say, "I love you," yet even though i feel it, amirite?

One of the mods at some point: "Hey guys, lets play a game where we all choose a PotD, and whoever's gets the fewest favourites wins!"

"Mid-life crisis" Is a phrase invented by women to keep their man at home instead of buying sweet motorcycles and shit, amirite?
Seriously...it's not that hard to find the clit, amirite?
@I know where my sisters is

I also know where your sister's is.