+3,815The new airport security motto: Can't see London, can't see France, until we see your underpants, amirite?
+3,755You hate it when people text you "k" because you're rarely in the mood to ever talk about potassium. amirite?
+3,483I just poured superglue into a non-stick pan. Somebody is going to be wrong. amirite?
+3,326When I was younger, my mom would give me $1 to go to the store. I could get 12 eggs, bags of candy, a gallon of milk and box of tea. You can't now though, there are way too many security cameras. amirite?
+3,193Lazy Rule #19401957294710149: you're so lazy you didn't even finish reading the number, amirite?
+3,130I put that "Take ten years off" make-up on my 9 and a half year old brother. I don't know where he went, but it might explain why my mom got fat and is acting like a bitch, amirite?
+2,977Two men walk into a bar. The first says, "I'll have some H2O." The second one says, "I'll have some H2O too." Then he dies, amirite?
+2,903If they shut down facebook, people would be roaming the streets in tears , shoving pictures of themselves in other people's faces yelling "DO YOU LIKE THIS?! DO YOU?!", amirite?
+2,858Elementary math problems are weird. "'I had 10 chocolate bars and ate 9. What do I have now?'" Oh, I don't know, DIABETES MAYBE.", amirite?
+2,734Funny prank: Change all the names in someone's phonebook to other peoples' names, and then while they're trying to figure it out you beat them to death with a crowbar, amirite?
+2,723The real reason many gay men choose to stay in the closet so long is because they have to find the perfect outfit to come out in, amirite?
+2,673It takes 7 seconds for food to pass from mouth to stomach. A human hair can hold 3kg. The length of a penis is 3 times the length of the thumb. The femur is as hard as concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. Women blink 2x as much as men. We use 300 muscles just to keep our balance when we stand. The woman has read this entire text. The man is still looking at his thumb, amirite?