+613The day you discovered "Open link in new tab" was the most productive day of your life, amirite?
+354When writing a speech, keep in mind that it's just like choosing a skirt. Too long and you'll look like a batty librarian, too short and we'll all know you probably haven't got a future in education, amirite?
+325A relationship without trust is like a phone with no service. And what do you do with a phone with no service? You play games... amirite?
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+543People become extremely violent around cute things: "You're so cute I could just eat you up! Yes I could, I could just bake you into a pie, serve you with whipped cream, and EAT YOU UP!", amirite?
+1,193it sucks when you're trying to eat cereal and the last 4 pieces are just like "try and catch me bitch", amirite?
+510It's annoying when commercials get you really amped up over something very insignificant. Like, "TODAY is the day to make a CHANGE!" "Fuck Yeah!" A CHANGE that is LONG overdue!" "That's right! Long overdue!" "YOU NEED to CHANGE your MAYONNAISE!!" "YEAH! CHANGE MY MAYO...wait what the fuck." It's a real boner killer, amirite?